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Ready to Rumble |
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Clues that you’re watching a shamelessly
puerile comedy: 1) The sweet little old lady
who curses like a sailor; 2) Frequent kicks to
the groin; 3) Crass jokes that cover every
bodily function and sexual organ known to
man. The bawdy Ready to Rumble has them all.
Die-hard wrestling fans Gordie (Arquette)
and Sean (Caan) pump septic tanks when
they’re not worshiping long-time WCW champ
Jimmy King (Platt). The duo even wears
homemade WWKD (What Would King Do?)
bracelets. So when the league sets King up
for an unceremonious exit from the ring, his
loyal subjects track him down and convince
the boorish drunkard to fight back and reclaim
his belt.
Cameos by actual pro wrestlers make
Rumble feel like a promotional video
for WCW Monday Nitro. Aimed at the
same preadolescent boys who’ve made that
one-ring circus a coveted prime-time empire,
the movie will offend most everyone
else.
Full of profanity and gross-out humor, the
film glamorizes violence in and out of
the ring. The camera leers at barely-clad
"Nitro Girls." Parents are mocked.
Religion is trivialized (Sean and Gordie lead a
group of nuns in Van Halen’s "Running
with the Devil"). And coming from the
director of Varsity Blues, it’s no shock to
find instances of casual sex and alcohol use.
In one scene, WCW’s evil owner brags
about influencing young fans’ loyalties:
"I’ll tell you about these kids—they’re
morons. They love who I tell
them to love." It’s clearly an opinion
shared by Warner Bros., which made this
exploitative mess.
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